According to research, there are scientific benefits to smiling. What’s better than a grin? Full-on laughter.

During the Thriving Families, Safer Children Kentucky team’s last meeting, we gathered at one of the collaborating partner’s organizations–the Commonwealth Center for Fathers and Families–to exchange our favorite dad jokes. The winning knee-slapper? “I’d like to thank all the sidewalks for keeping me off the streets.” 

But what is funny about child abuse and how does humor and comradery prevent it? 

Thriving Families, Safer Children, at the national level, is a movement. The goal of this movement is to support communities, which include members with former child welfare involvement, in developing approaches for community well-being that help families avoid child welfare system involvement.

Oftentimes, conversations about preventing child abuse aren’t really about prevention. They are about detecting and reporting something that possibly already occurred or is suspected to soon occur. 

What if we thought about child abuse another way? What if we backed up to when a parent had a really difficult day and we inserted something different? 

Imagine a parent waking up after the loss of a close family member only to discover a flat tire, which made them late to work, resulting in a loss of a few hours of pay, right after an unexpectedly high electric bill. Then, after an exhausting shift, being three dollars short in the grocery checkout lane when trying to purchase formula and wipes for their crying 6-month-old, while the baby’s 4-year-old sibling screams for a bag of lime green Skittles candy. Onlookers shake their heads in disgust at this parent’s clear lack of composure and inability to come prepared for their purchases. The cashier visibly expresses frustration when having to void the wipes only to have to tell the parent they are still short because the wipes only took $2.49 off the total. 

“You remind me of what I looked like when my kids were that little. You’re doing a great job.” 

While the exact above-described scenario didn’t happen to me, I have heard that quote. At times where I had fully braced myself for an onslaught of judgment about who I was as a mother, and even at times, a person. And those words, coupled with a warm smile, took me a step back from the edge. 

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. Many of us know the unfortunate numbers for situations where it was too late. But how many of us are aware of how many parents, and families, in our very own communities where we live, work, and serve daily, just need a friendly face or encouraging word? 

From the roadside assistance tech, to the coworker who covered part of the shift, to the community organization that subsidized the abnormal utility fee, to the bagger who stepped in to give the kids stickers to distract them from candy and tears, to the older couple standing behind the parent who put the wipes back on the conveyer belt and handed them a $10 bill, to the person parked next to the parent who took the cart to the return and wished the family a good evening, there are so many opportunities–through both words and action–to smile for child abuse. 

Here are some of the ways family well-being can show up in Kentucky communities:

  • Develop user-friendly and accessible processes. Our stakeholders matter beyond case numbers. They are individuals and families with unique literacy, language, and cultural needs. Client voice and experience matters. 
  • Improve human centered service delivery systems. By elevating the voice of those directly impacted, we can ensure we are solving the right problems and creating effective solutions that are meaningful and honoring to those closest to the issues. 
  • Create inclusive communities. When we mention families and community, we’re talking about ALL families. We need communities that embrace all through supplemental programs, community and faith-based specialized assistance programs, and more, while being intentional that no one falls through the cracks. 
  • Promote collective responsibility. We know to say something when we see a concern, but why do we wait for someone else to fill a need? Let that person be you. 
  • Simply acknowledge humanity. This includes modeling empathy, benevolence, and grace. We all make mistakes. 

The Thriving Families, Safer Children Kentucky collaborative believes strong communities that support parents and caregivers and wrap around to prevent them from falling over the edge, can keep families together and children safe from harm. 

This month and all-year-round, will you join us? 

The Thriving Families, Safer Children Kentucky team in action: