I have a story to tell you. 

When I gave birth to my twins, I fully anticipated being greeted outside the labor and delivery door by the Publisher’s Clearinghouse Sweepstakes Patrol to begin my weekly checks for life. I mean, don’t all parents get money to do the hard, often thankless job of raising the next generation? 

Data from the U.S. Agriculture Department estimates it costs $17,000 a year to raise a child. To take home $17,000 a year, one would have to earn a gross pay of $1,417 per month. That’s not including any of the other costs of living. 

Going back to the original scene, when I didn’t get handed the coveted prize money, what did I take home instead (or rather, who)? Not one, but two, then-4 pound 28-week born babies. By myself as a single parent. With my then-28 years of imperfections built up. 

“Shame dies when stories are told in safe spaces.” – Ann Voskamp

But where has it been safe for parents to tell their stories? Aren’t they all one publicly witnessed flaw away from being left empty-handed? 

What’s worse is when this does occur, what do the people on the other side get? Both federal and state dollars to raise the child. Sometimes even donations. On top of other incentives and supports like medical, clothing, and respite care. 

We’ve all heard that the squeaky wheel gets the grease, meaning whoever is the loudest gets served. But historically in the child welfare space, everyone has seemed to be loud except…parents. Which goes back to the shame. 

In Kentucky, a much-needed safe space for parent voice was created through the statewide parent council as one of the Thriving Families, Safer Children Kentucky priorities, a collaborative under a national effort to reimagine child welfare and keep families together. 

Here is a breakdown of KY SEAT:

KYSEAT LogoWHO? 

Kentucky System Experience At the Table (KY SEAT). 

The statewide parent advisory council includes a diverse group of parents from across the commonwealth who have a range of expertise and personal experiences within the child welfare system or who have utilized community support.

WHAT? 

Ensuring Parent Voice has a SEAT at the Table.

The goal of the statewide parent advisory council is to provide guidance to Kentucky’s child welfare system, including policymakers, service providers, community workers, and the public child welfare agency. It is designed to ensure strong parent voices are involved in shaping programs, policies, and practices resulting in better outcomes for children, families, and communities.

WHEN?

Formed in the summer of 2022. KY SEAT has one to two virtual group meetings a month and participates in various virtual and in-person advocacy opportunities and events around the state.

WHERE?

Across all regions of Kentucky. 

WHY? 

To inform effective policies that support families, better primary preventative systems and programs, and ultimately end the need for agency involvement at all. 

So no Kentucky parent feels alone.

What are the benefits of being a KY SEAT member?

  • Help shape improvements within the child welfare system and other supportive services available to parents and families.
  • Build awareness of the opportunities for systems improvements.
  • Leadership, advocacy, and public-speaking training and roles.
  • Introductions and ongoing collaboration with state leaders and elected officials.
  • Blog posts and Op-eds featured on social media platforms and in media and news sources.
  • Engage with peers in a coalition.
  • Compensation for time and expertise.

What are the membership expectations?

  • Maintain confidentiality of what is said and shared by the group.
  • Be forward-thinking and solutions focused.
  • Be ready to partner alongside the child welfare agency.
  • Be willing to commit to the council for a minimum of 12 months and attend 75% of the monthly meetings.

So now that it has been a year, what specifically have the KY SEAT members accomplished?

  • Formed the council by creating a mission and vision statement, shared values, logo and tagline, and member handbook.
  • Completed legislative, advocacy, storytelling, and leadership trainings. 
  • Created an informational flyer and a recruitment flyer.
  • Quarterly meetings with DCBS leadership and staff.
  • Participated in both virtual and in-person DCBS planning and feedback meetings.
  • Published op-ed in the Herald Leader.
  • Co-facilitated child welfare focus groups across the state.
  • Launched a closed social media group.
  • Released a public webpage.
  • Member interview featured in a child abuse and neglect special on KET.
  • Attended Children’s Advocacy Day at the Capitol and had a photo op with the Governor.
  • Had the first annual Council Anniversary group lunch.
  • Attended a legislative committee meeting in Frankfort and introduced the council to the co-chairs.

What is next for the council?

  • A panel discussion at the 2023 Kids Are Worth It! Conference. 
  • A table with DCBS at the KY State Fair. 

How can you celebrate one year with the KY SEAT members?

Encourage a parent today. Where they may have previously faced judgment, be the face of compassion. Recognize that parenting is tough and we’re not all entering the race from the same starting point. If there isn’t immediate danger, take a pause before you report and ask yourself if there is an opportunity to support.  

Interested in learning more, joining, or know a parent who would be a good fit? 

KY SEAT will be onboarding a new cohort of parent leaders over the next few months. The current application window closes September 30th. Parents who apply will be asked to complete an interview, orientation, and training. 

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All children deserve a safe, stable home. But they also need authentic, natural love and belonging. If safety and stability are concerns, let’s support parents to get to where they need to be so families can stay together, heal, and thrive. 

Can we all be loud for that?